Riverside California Family Law Blog

Whether you're the payer or the receiver of alimony, it's important to keep your documents organized and readily available in case an issue ever develops. Perhaps, for example, your spouse stops paying you alimony or doesn't pay the full amount you're owed -- your documents will help to prove that this has occurred. Alternatively, maybe you've been paying your alimony each month but the receiving spouse accuses you of not fulfilling your monthly obligations. Here, your documents will offer the proof to show you've adhered to your court orders.

As for what documents each ex-spouse should keep, here's what the paying spouse needs to maintain on file:

Parents can become so ensnared in their own emotions relating to their divorce proceedings that they may not notice that their children are suffering too. Here are a few ways that you can stay attentive to your children's needs during and after your divorce process:

Look for the signs that your child is having a hard time: In extreme cases, your child might commit crimes, hurt animals or threaten or bully others. In other cases, your child might simply be highly emotional, accusatory, depressed or difficult to discipline. Get help from a mental health professional if you see these difficulties surfacing, and be patient with your child during this "adjustment" phase.

Some parents view their divorces like they're experiencing a "train wreck," and they're the conductors at the center of it all. The stress and emotional mayhem that ensues when parents don't find their emotional centers during their marital breakups can be difficult to manage. It can also cause them to forget that other people -- namely, their children –- are suffering as a result of the divorce just as much, if not more. However, they don't have the most articulate ways of expressing their emotions.

Here are a few things to remember to help you provide the right kind of support for your children during a divorce:

It's never easy to hear stories about domestic violence happening in a home. The instinctive human reaction is to protect the individuals being abused. The problem is, if the victims of domestic violence are still trapped in the throes of a complicated love union, they may not be ready for help. Ultimately, every victim of domestic violence needs to wake up (on their own time) and realize that the full force of California law is on their side.

When a victim is ready to take action to stop the cycle of domestic abuse that's plaguing them, it may be necessary to seek emotional and physical protection by applying for a restraining order:

• Get help from a lawyer or a domestic violence clinic to make sure you qualify for a domestic violence restraining order and to assist you with appropriately filling out the applicable forms. There may be other forms you need to fill out. For example, if you have children, you may want to file the appropriate forms to receive child support and set up child custody arrangements and a child visitation plan.
• File your domestic violence restraining order forms with the court. You should receive the judge's decision about the restraining order within the next business day, more or less. If granted, keep a copy of the restraining order on your person at all times, keep a copy in a safe deposit box and keep copies in all the locations where the restrained person is prohibited from being and give a copy to security officers in these areas.
• Hire a professional process server to serve the restraining order on the restrained individual. The restraining order cannot be enforced until after it has been served by a third-party process server (i.e., not by yourself).
• Prepare for your court hearing: You'll need to present your case during an in-person court hearing to ensure your restraining order is enforceable. Make sure you're well-prepared for this hearing and that you know the legal issues inside and out.