There's nothing worse than having your worst fears play out in front of your eyes, but that's what is happening to a mother from California. According to a news release from Feb. 20, a mother alerted the courts to the fact that her children were worried that their father would take them on vacation to Lebanon but never bring them back.
As a father, you feel that you may have less of a chance at sole or primary custody than the mother of your children. You feel you may even struggle to have shared custody that is equal or close to it. While fathers shouldn't have a harder time than mothers obtaining custody, there are some things you can do to make your efforts known.
DNA is an important piece of evidence in child support and child custody cases. Without evidence of a child's father, it's not possible to hold him accountable for child support. Additionally, fathers without paternity rights may struggle to get enough time with their children, if they're able to see their children at all.
When child custody disputes begin to affect your ability to work, it can be a frustrating issue. Not only that, but it costs you money and time. Take for example this news story about Victoria Azarenka, who has to miss the fourth tennis tournament this year because of an ongoing custody dispute. If she wants to work, she needs to leave the state without her child, which is something she is not comfortable doing.
If you want to win child custody, there are several things you should and should not do. For example, you should always get to court on time to show the judge that you're good at keeping appointments and are taking the case seriously. You should dress professionally and present yourself in a calm manner.
Child custody cases are sometimes contentious, so it's not a surprise that a mother or father might fight with one another. Even if they live together, like the couple in this case, the person who has legal custody still gets to make decisions for the welfare of the children.
A mother in California was shocked to find out that she'd have to pay close to $500 a month in child support, but even worse, most of that money wouldn't go to her children. Instead, that money would be used to pay back her ex-husband's state aid.
The only way to guarantee a child's father's identity is by performing a DNA test to prove paternity. Paternity tests are highly accurate and take either blood or tissue samples from the father and child before matching them. If the DNA samples line up, then the father and child are related. If not, then the child has another parent who is not yet known. You have a right to seek a paternity test if you question paternity at all.
Your children are not the deliverers of your news to your ex. They are not the go-betweens when you and your ex can't get along. As divorced parents, it's up to you to focus on what's best for your children, and that is not to use them as your messengers.
When a baby is born, it's important to determine who the legal father is. The legal definition of a father is the man who will be granted parental rights and the right to visitation and custody. When mothers and fathers are married at the time of the baby's birth, the man is typically assumed to be the father and is named on the birth certificate.